Silence and Your Wife


“Darling, does this outfit make me look fat?”

When one of my wife’s friends got married my mind drifted back to when my relationship was young. If I had only been given a list of what not to say in certain situations, when to keep silence, my life would probably have been a lot easier. The ailment is often called, “Foot in mouth disease” and a scripture explains: “…no one can tame the tongue, it is a restless evil and full of deadly poison.” Well, while it’s true, that no one can control the tongue perfectly, I suggest trying duct tape and keep it quiet as frequently as possible.

Oh if we could take back words which have left our mouths. Sometimes, these words are said in jest, sometimes seriously, however, regardless of how they were sent, it doesn’t mean they will be received in the same manner.  Silence would have been the more successful route.  Here are some words I have heard over time and I myself won’t admit to having said:

“[insert here] is woman’s work.”
Any sound imitating a truck backing up…
“Is your mother coming over again?”
“Oink Oink”
“Get those bare feet back in the kitchen where they belong…”
“My mom could teach you how to cook better.”
“You never miss a meal do you?”
“I had a girlfriend who wore something like that…”
“Does your family tree have any branches?”
“Having a bad hair day?”
“I’m the man that is why…”
“Did you do anything around here today?”
“I bought a book on dieting for you.”
“It took you an hour to look like that?”

These are phrases guys just say sometimes without thinking. It isn’t something said in anger, it’s insanity. Keep a handle on what you say men. There are going to be times when you are angry and during that time insanity will try to multiply. You think you are going to one up anything your wife says or that you are going to put her in “her place”? Nooooooo! Don’t ever let those words escape your lips. The Bible says: “Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger;” Listen to what your wife has to say. Be patient, considerate, and deliberate.  Seize silence for a few moments and consider what will come out of your mouth afterward.

There is a reason women like the strong, silent type. When we aren’t silent, we tend to get ourselves in a heap of trouble. Consider the great battles that have raged over time because rash words were spoken. Ask yourself if having the last word is really worth the pain it will cause. I guarantee she will deal better with your silence than you will when she gives you the silent treatment. The best advice I can give a young man entering into the marriage covenant comes from an inspired source:

Psalms 141:3 – Set a guard, O LORD, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips!

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