Atheist Churches

A House (of Athiests) Divided

As I’m sure you’ve seen in the headlines in the last couple of years, churches for atheists are gaining quite a following. Sure, they maintain their staunch belief that God doesn’t exist, but they see the value in the community aspect of the churches around them, and they want a part in that. They describe themselves as “a secular urban oasis, where atheists could enjoy the benefits of traditional church – the sense of community, the weekly sermon, the scheduled time for reflection, the community service opportunities, the ethos of self-improvement, the singing and the free food – without God.” In a twist that seems inevitable and contains more than a little irony, though, turmoil is starting to develop among their churches. Splits are beginning to occur, and there is division among the leadership about which direction the atheist church “Assembly” movement should take going forward from here.

On the surface, their division is mainly focused on how atheistic they should be. Some believe that atheism should be their main emphasis, while others maintain that the movement should focus on all anti-religious people (agnostics, humanists, skeptics, etc.). They’ve missed a crucial point though, and it’s one we can be guilty of missing as well. The sense of love, caring, and community that they set out to achieve doesn’t exist without the love of Jesus Christ. If we don’t have the same attitude in ourselves that He possessed as He gave up heaven, came to earth, and went to His death on the cross (Philippians 2), our own opinions, selfish desires, and stubborn wills can only end in division. The churches the atheists model themselves after don’t work simply because a bunch of people come together with common goals, interests, lifestyles, and beliefs. Rather, they work because they have one key factor in common – the love of Christ that is shared in common because of the promise of His blood. When that key element is removed as in an atheist church or when we stop reminding ourselves of it in the church (as the Philippian church had), unity can’t be found.

The very foundation of the church and every good thing that it does is the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ. From those we derive our distinguishing marks – the love that we hold in common (John 13:35) and the doctrine that sets the guidelines for how we live, act, and worship (John 14:15). Atheist churches have no hope because they are missing these key elements. These principles don’t just affect atheist churches, though. Splits, division, and sharp disagreement occur in the church as well. Ephesians 4:1-3 reminds us that we must be diligent to preserve our peace and unity that come from the Spirit. As the church can become fractured into small cliques and sects when we look out for ourselves first or don’t show the love of Christ in all things, we have to be all the more diligent in this day and age to prove ourselves united in Him.

The only way for humans to ever become truly unified in one mind and purpose is through the love of Jesus Christ. Is that love alive, working, and evident in your congregation? Your life?  My life? I hope we’ll all take some time to think on these things.

Posted in Brad Harrub | Tagged , , , | Comments Off on Atheist Churches

Faith Comes by Hearing

I read a sign the other day that read, “Faith is caught, not taught.” I thought about that for a few seconds and remembered the words of Paul in Romans 10:17: “So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.” Thus, I believe the one who wrote the expression would be at odds with the apostle Paul, who emphasizes the need of teaching. In fact, the context of this passage expressly points this out: “…and how shall they believe in him of whom they have not heard? And how shall they hear without a preacher?” (Rom. 10:14). In other words, hearing the taught instructions of the word of God is essential to acquiring faith. Let us see how the Bible emphasizes hearing instruction.

First, note the swift hearers: “Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath” (James 1:19). This word “swift” describes something that is quick, fleet, running fast, as if a person is really putting forth some effort to hear. Thus, we need to be running fast to hear, which reminds us of what Jesus said in Matthew 5:6: “Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled.” Therefore, one should be swift to hear the taught truth of the word of God, and will likewise respond accordingly.

Second, note the structured hearers (Matt. 7:24-27). When Jesus concluded His great Sermon on the Mount, His conclusion was a parable of two structured houses on different foundations. He compared the individual who hears and obeys to a wise man whose structure was on a solid foundation, but He compared the individual who hears and does not obey to a foolish man whose structure was on a shaky foundation—sand. Thus, the intended lesson is quite clear—we are to hear with the intention of obeying!

Third, note the soiled hearers (Matt. 13:1-23). In this infamous parable, Jesus narrates a sower who scattered seed on four different types of soil, each discussing the way people hear the gospel. Some would hear without understanding and quickly lose whatever benefit they gained (Matt. 13:19). Some would hear joyfully, but lose what was gained by tribulation or persecution (Matt. 13:20-21). Some would hear, but lose what was gained by “the care of this world, and the deceitfulness of riches” (Matt. 13:22). Some would hear with “an honest and good heart … [and] keep it, and bring forth fruit with patience” (cf. Luke 8:15). This latter soiled hearer is the type of hearer that God desires.

Therefore, Jesus said it best when he stated, “It is written in the prophets, And they shall be all taught of God. Every man therefore that hath heard, and hath learned of the Father, cometh unto me” (John 6:45).

Posted in Sam Willcut | Tagged , , , | Comments Off on Faith Comes by Hearing

Reality Check

Image is everything! The problem we have is that the image we have of ourselves is not usually reality. Reality is defined as “the state of things as they actually exist, as opposed to an idealistic or notional idea of them.” The man who sees himself as a “humble servant” may, in reality, be seen by those around him as an arrogant hypocrite. The woman who sees herself as a stalwart and faithful child of God may, in reality, be a lukewarm and divisive enemy of the truth. While we may see ourselves as the valiant salmon swimming mightily upstream we may, in reality, be a dead, stinking carp floating down the river.

Not only is self-image a problem for so many but an inordinate obsession with how others view us is equally disconcerting. We hear people say all the time that they “don’t care what anybody else thinks.” This is simply not true because we all care about what someone thinks! The real problem for the vast majority of people is that “who we wish be approved of” is misplaced.

The truth is we want to be seen as righteous but want to live whatever kind of lives we so choose. This has lead to the myriad of arguments like “You can’t judge me,” or “God wants me to be happy.” Friends, when will we stop the nonsense and start asking ourselves “How does God see me?” and then have the courage to be honest with that appraisal and then do something positive about it?

What will be the results of this kind of “reality” check?

  1. We will truly repent of our sins (Acts 26:20). People don’t repent and turn to God because they have a warped sense of reality. They do not see themselves as God sees them. If we saw ourselves the way God sees us we would be on our knees begging His forgiveness!
  2. We will be more evangelistic (Matthew 28:18–20). If we saw ourselves as God sees us we would be less worried about hurting peoples feelings and more worried about the fact that they were lost!
  3. We will speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15). This goes hand in hand with the previous point but with one distinction. We would be direct, but loving; faithful, but patient; sound, but compassionate. Screaming, “Turn or Burn!” doesn’t convert anyone.
  4. We will be more benevolent and less selfish (Philippians 2:3; Galatians 6:10). If we see ourselves as God sees us we would be appalled at how selfish and stingy we are. We would realize that everything we have belongs to Him and should be used for His glory. It is just stuff, it is temporal, and in relation to eternity is really pretty inconsequential.
  5. We will be obedient and faithful (Hebrews 5:8–9; 2 Thessalonians 1:8; Revelation 2:10). If we saw ourselves as God sees us we would obey the gospel of Jesus Christ and we would live faithful Christian lives in hope of eternal life through His Son!

God sees everything and He sees us as we actually are. “The eyes of the LORD are in every place, keeping watch on the evil and the good” (Proverbs 15:3). We ought not kid ourselves into thinking that when God looks at us He necessarily sees good. But we should consider how God defines evil and that “the eyes of the LORD are on the righteous, and His ears are open to their prayers; but the face of the LORD is against those who do evil” (1 Peter 3:12).

Look into the mirror of God’s Word and see yourself as God sees you. What do you see? A sinner in need of God’s saving grace? A saint that needs to be more focused and faithful to the will of the Father? A dead, stinkin’ fish? God loves you and He sent His Son to die for you. How will you respond?

Obey Him and be faithful!

Posted in Tim Dooley | Tagged , , | Comments Off on Reality Check

The Church as Community

A 2006 Barna survey suggested that only eighteen percent (18%) of people professing to be born again Christians “firmly embraced the idea that spiritual maturity requires involvement in a community of faith.”

Only 17% of adults said that “a person’s faith is meant to be developed mainly by involvement in a local church.” Even the most devoted church-going groups – such as evangelicals and born again Christians – generally dismissed that notion: only one-third of all evangelicals and one out of five non-evangelical born again adults endorsed the concept. Only one out of every four adults who possesses a biblical worldview (25%) agreed with the centrality of a local church in a person’s spiritual growth. [1]

Such a survey makes one wonder whether or not there is any value in the concept of a spiritual community.

In the six years that I worked with the Berryville church of Christ, I spent five and a half years getting up on Tuesday morning and going to the local community center to do volunteer work.  My role was primarily sitting at the front desk, greeting visitors, and answering their questions.  It was a good opportunity for me to get to know the people in the community as well as conduct evangelistic efforts for the church.  From this practical experience, I learned that there is value in the concept of community.

“It is not good that the man should be alone” (Genesis 2:18).

We consider community to be essential to the life of a healthy person.  When community becomes disparate, we invent new ways to be social.  The advent of social web sites offers the experience of a community in a mobile world that geographically divides friends and families over vast areas.

We have institutions that reflect our need for community.  The existence of government implies our social nature and our desire to maintain orderly communities.  The foundation of society, the family, is a social entity.  It is part of God’s created order, the primal community.

“Upon this rock I will build my church” (Matthew 16:18).

Christian societies have three basic social structures: the family, the government, and the church.  The family’s emphasis is upon raising children to be successful adults.  The government’s emphasis is upon maintaining order.  Though only spiritual truths may successfully guide these institutions, the role of community in both of these institutions is primarily physical in application; that is, it pertains to this world.  Neither geographically delimited governments nor physical family relationships will persist in eternity (Revelation 20:1; Matthew 22:30).

The church, however, provides a community experience that is primarily spiritual in nature and which will continue beyond this world (Revelation 22:3-4).  The Old Testament addressed community in terms of “carnal ordinances” (Hebrews 9:10); the New Covenant addresses community in terms of spirituality and spiritual development (2 Corinthians 3:6).  Humanity’s need for community is at least one premise behind the formation and maintenance of Christ’s church.

Our need for community transcends the physical need of survival.  Animals may display such a physical need for community, but humans are above and beyond the animal world.  Community is the basic outlet for our expressions of love and freedom (Matthew 22:39; Galatians 5:13).  It is the place where one may demonstrate true altruism (Luke 6:35).  A community is also needed in order for absolute humility to be practiced (Philippians 2:3-4).

“Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together” (Hebrews 10:25).

In that regard, human community is fundamentally a spiritual need.  When we use community in a mere physical way, we reduce ourselves to the level of beasts.  By recognizing the spiritual aspects of community, however, we are enabled to become something better and higher; something spiritual.  Such a need can be satisfied only in the midst of like-minded individuals who foster an environment that nurtures such growth – the church!

In God’s eternal wisdom, he foresaw man’s need for spiritual community and set out to establish the church (Ephesians 3:10-11).  This fundamental spiritual need for community underscores the instruction of Hebrews 10:25 not to forsake the assembly.  Why anyone would forsake their need for a spiritual community or deem it unnecessary speaks to carnal motivations.

[1] http://www.barna.org/barna-update/article/12-faithspirituality/267-americans-have-commitment-issues-new-survey-shows

Posted in Kevin Cauley | Tagged , , | Comments Off on The Church as Community

Bullies in the Church

A person very dear to me asked if I thought there were bullies in the Church. My answer to him was a resounding “Yes!”. When the mind turns itself to thinking about what a bully is, we may think of some big guy who pushes folks around. The bully scares them and gets what he wants because of how he acts. Typically, but not always, he has a “posse”, that is a group of folks who do what he says because of fear, admiration, a family relationship, or personal benefit. Yes, the bully may even be a woman.

Are we talking about the Church? The place where folks go to worship God who strive to devote their life in purity to Christ? Yes, but remember, even in the Church, there are folks who make mistakes, make poor decisions, and who put their worldly desires ahead of Christ. You do not need to look far in the scriptures to see examples of reprimand for poor behavior on behalf of folks calling themselves by Christ’s name. That man is not perfect left to his own behavior, is exactly why Christ came to earth. “Luk 12:51 – Think ye that I am come to give peace in the earth? I tell you, Nay; but rather division:”. We are going to view another scripture in a moment using the word division. However, it is not used in the same manner. The division of Christ is to make a clear distinction between those who are obeying His Words and those who are not.

To be exact about what constitutes bullying, I want to provide the key terms defining a bully from Random House Dictionary: intimidate; domineer, coerce, and overbearing. A bully in the Church may fit all of these terms or only one of them. All bullies are not the same. They do not all operate in the same fashion. They may not even realize they are bullies. However, they are all detrimental to the function of the Church if their behaviors are not addressed. They will create division in a negative fashion as opposed to that which Christ creates.

1 Corinthians 1:10 Now I beseech you, brethren, through the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that ye all speak the same thing and that there be no divisions among you; but that ye be perfected together in the same mind and in the same judgment.

Romans 16:17 – Now I beseech you, brethren, mark them that are causing the divisions and occasions of stumbling, contrary to the doctrine which ye learned: and turn away from them.

As you can see, the division spoken of in these verses is not desired. In fact, Gal. 5:20 speaks of division as a work of the flesh, a sinful occurrence.

Now, what does a bully look like in the Church? Well, as mentioned, they may be male or female. They may be a little old lady, a popular “youth minister”, a preacher, deacon, or elder (or their wives), a middle aged businessman, a very aggressive, extrovert female, or a host of other forms. In fact, do not think for a moment that bullies are only singular in form. They may be the “pillar of the congregation” couple who has been there since the location was founded. Perhaps they are the family with many young children. They may be the family which has generations of members in the building. Yes, they can even be the family which “gives” the most in the form of contribution. “2 Corinthians 11:14 And no marvel; for even Satan fashioneth himself into an angel of light.” To be clear, the context of 2 Corinthians is folks purposely sinful. Bullies aren’t always aware of their sinful behavior. The comparision comes because sometimes, bullies are wrapped in an appearance for which you would least expect there to be a problem.

Sadly, there are so many examples of bullying I have seen or heard of in the Church. Some were dealt with, some not. The fact is, many are simply ignored so as not to “rock the boat”. How do these folks create an intimidating, domineering, coercing, and overbearing atmosphere? I will list a number of examples, though certainly it is not an exhaustive list.

First consider as a potential bully, the well known Diotrephes as a bully. 3 John 1:9, speaks of this person as being one who loves preeminence. By definition, this is one who loves being first. The issue is purposefully being in control of everything that is happening. Because they are in the middle of everything, they develop a perception of having power or control. In the Church, folks do not desire conflict. Many do not want to be perceived as being pushy. Consequently, when someone puts themselves in the middle of everything and more or less takes control, few people are going to say anything. The fact is things need to be done and unfortunately, many times there are not folks stepping up to do the work that needs to be done. Diotrephes at times is even considered somewhat of a hero in a congregation. Unfortunately, this can result in a situation where things are not done, unless they are done Diotrephes way. We start with examining the Diotrephes personality because it actually has a great similarity to the other bully personalities. They all want their way and in one way or another have found a way to exert pressure to get what they want.

Second consider as a potential bully, Mr. or Mrs. Popularity. If you disagree with them or they do not get their way, then you are going to have a large number of people (their posse) miffed at you. You will be “blackballed”, meaning you won’t be part of their “in” group. Yes, it sounds like high school. Wherever you find folks gathering together: school, work, sports, recreation groups, or congregations, these groups will form. Sometimes, we even encourage the separation, breaking members off into groups and limiting the interaction of the full body together (teens, seniors, singles, couples, couples with kids, mids, etc.). In each of these groups, leaders arise and they are not always the kind of leader that represents Christ appropriately. They take control and exert their bully behavior.

Third consider as a potential bully, the “Youth Minister”. As stated before by me in other discussions, the youth ministers should be mom and dad. However, since this is an ever increasing position within the Churches, let me suggest that the proper person be selected for this position. That is preferably a middle aged man who has raised his children up and out of the home. One who has no illusions about being “King of the Youth”. A person who understands that they are under an eldership and their responsibility is making certain the Bible is taught. They are not a mother or father replacement. What I have seen occur is that a “youth minister” may become one who is viewed as the high authority on how to handle youths. What they want they get. If their way is not approved, they have the youth stage a revolt/temper tantrum to get their way. Parents don’t want whiney children. If the Children whine, the youth minister often gets his way. This means, of course, that an eldership is given the what for by parents for the youth minister and bullied into backing down. Bullying behavior is often accomplished through the means of others (the posse).

Fourth consider as a potential bully, the preacher, who through his words directs a congregation into getting his way. A preacher certainly holds a spot central to a congregation. They also hold the ears of an eldership. This is a position which has no authority, but which yields a great deal of influence. They must remember their position as one who is sharing the word of God. Their words must have the authority of Scripture. They must submit themselves to an eldership all the while being the best servant they can to encourage and aid the eldership. They must not make the decisions for an eldership. The sad part of this close and personal relationship with elders is the wide open area for criticism of undue influence. A strong eldership will not allow such bullying from a preacher or those who falsely accuse him. A strong preacher, will remember he is but a servant with no authority to oversee. Of course, the one caveat here is if the preacher is also an elder. That too is a unique situation, but this is why choosing an eldership should not be done in haphazard fashion.

Fifth consider as a potential bully, wives of preachers, deacons, and elders who must remember they are not co-preacher, deacon or elder. They are simply Christians. Often congregations treat these folks as if they do have authority. They have none. Many a wife has dominated what happens as far as ladies groups, activities, youth education, and class discussion. The influence a wife has upon her husband is great. Yet, it is not their place to badger or coerce their husbands into decisions (I Corinthians 11:3). This is not an uncommon behavior. This bullying reflects poorly upon the family and the congregation. Briefly, on the other side of that coin, many a preacher, deacon, and elder’s wife has been mistreated for the decisions or actions of their husbands.

Finally considered as potential bullies, let’s group together the family who contributes a large amount each week, the family with many children, and the family who has many generations of members attending. These groups are offering very precious commodities. Funds are often viewed as indispensible (they aren’t). Youth are often viewed as indispensible (they aren’t). Many members are often viewed as indispensible (they aren’t). Are all of these a blessing to have? Yes! Can a congregation be sound and pleasing to God without them? Yes. Yet, some folks feel they can get their way if they threaten to leave and take their funds, youth, or families. This is a very common bullying ploy in congregations. It is shameful and disgusting. Yet, it is often effective. Everyone tiptoes around these folks because of fear of upsetting them. Weak preachers avoid topics which might cause ripples among them. Weak elderships dismiss preachers who rile these folks with sound truthful lessons.

As stated, these are not the only examples I have seen or heard of which demonstrate bullying in the Church. I do want to point out, however, that these folks often exhibit passive aggressive behavior. Their words are often demonstrative of a “woe is me” or “poor me” attitude. They say all they want was to be helpful, involved, and appreciated. Then, when they don’t get their way, they stop attending, refuse to cooperate or participate in activities and classes, cut their funds, pull their kids out of classes, or go off and create their own activity with their group or friends as a sort of “I told you so” example. They want their way and if you don’t bend, they will show you. They will pout, whine to others, and generally create headaches for folks until they get what they want – unless, the eldership refuses to put up with it. That, of course, goes straight to the topic of Church discipline which is another topic altogether.

Friends, consider these verses:

1 Corinthians 12:12-14 – For as the body is one, and hath many members, and all the members of the body, being many, are one body; so also is Christ. For in one Spirit were we all baptized into one body, whether Jews or Greeks, whether bond or free; and were all made to drink of one Spirit. For the body is not one member, but many.

1 Corinthians 6:19-20 – Or know ye not that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit which is in you, which ye have from God? and ye are not your own; for ye were bought with a price: glorify God therefore in your body.

Ephesians 4:4-6 There is one body, and one Spirit, even as also ye were called in one hope of your calling; one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father of all, who is over all, and through all, and in all.

The body of Christ is to be a unified body. Division is not acceptable. Bullying, which causes division, is sinful. There is no member or group of members which is more important than any other. If bullying occurs within a congregation repentance must occur. This can occur only if the individuals or groups are approached and directed into proper behavior (Matthew 18:15-17). If they do not repent, then the Godly division which Christ spoke about must occur. The sinners must be separated from the Saints.

A person very dear to me asked if I thought there were bullies in the Church. My answer to him was a resounding “Yes!”. When the mind turns itself to thinking about what a bully is, we may think of some big guy who pushes folks around. The bully scares them and gets what he wants because of how he acts. Typically, but not always, he has a “posse”, that is a group of folks who do what he says because of fear, admiration, a family relationship, or personal benefit. Yes, the bully may even be a woman. Are we talking about the Church? The place where folks go to worship God who strive to devote their life in purity to Christ? Yes, but remember, even in the Church, there are folks who make mistakes, make poor decisions, and who put their worldly desires ahead of Christ. You do not need to look far in the scriptures to see examples of reprimand for poor behavior on behalf of folks calling themselves by Christ’s name. That man is not perfect left to his own behavior, is exactly why Christ came to earth. “Luk 12:51 – Think ye that I am come to give peace in the earth? I tell you, Nay; but rather division:”. We are going to view another scripture in a moment using the word division. However, it is not used in the same manner. The division of Christ is to make a clear distinction between those who are obeying His Words and those who are not.To be exact about what constitutes bullying, I want to provide the key terms defining a bully from Random House Dictionary: intimidate; domineer, coerce, and overbearing. A bully in the Church may fit all of these terms or only one of them. All bullies are not the same. They do not all operate in the same fashion. They may not even realize they are bullies. However, they are all detrimental to the function of the Church if their behaviors are not addressed. They will create division in a negative fashion as opposed to that which Christ creates.1 Corinthians 1:10 Now I beseech you, brethren, through the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that ye all speak the same thing and that there be no divisions among you; but that ye be perfected together in the same mind and in the same judgment.Romans 16:17 – Now I beseech you, brethren, mark them that are causing the divisions and occasions of stumbling, contrary to the doctrine which ye learned: and turn away from them.As you can see, the division spoken of in these verses is not desired. In fact, Gal. 5:20 speaks of division as a work of the flesh, a sinful occurrence.Now, what does a bully look like in the Church? Well, as mentioned, they may be male or female. They may be a little old lady, a popular “youth minister”, a preacher, deacon, or elder (or their wives), a middle aged businessman, a very aggressive, extrovert female, or a host of other forms. In fact, do not think for a moment that bullies are only singular in form. They may be the “pillar of the congregation” couple who has been there since the location was founded. Perhaps they are the family with many young children. They may be the family which has generations of members in the building. Yes, they can even be the family which “gives” the most in the form of contribution. “2 Corinthians 11:14 And no marvel; for even Satan fashioneth himself into an angel of light.” To be clear, the context of 2 Corinthians is folks purposely sinful. Bullies aren’t always aware of their sinful behavior. The comparision comes because sometimes, bullies are wrapped in an appearance for which you would least expect there to be a problem.Sadly, there are so many examples of bullying I have seen or heard of in the Church. Some were dealt with, some not. The fact is, many are simply ignored so as not to “rock the boat”. How do these folks create an intimidating, domineering, coercing, and overbearing atmosphere? I will list a number of examples, though certainly it is not an exhaustive list.

First consider as a potential bully, the well known Diotrephes as a bully. 3 John 1:9, speaks of this person as being one who loves preeminence. By definition, this is one who loves being first. The issue is purposefully being in control of everything that is happening. Because they are in the middle of everything, they develop a perception of having power or control. In the Church, folks do not desire conflict. Many do not want to be perceived as being pushy. Consequently, when someone puts themselves in the middle of everything and more or less takes control, few people are going to say anything. The fact is things need to be done and unfortunately, many times there are not folks stepping up to do the work that needs to be done. Diotrephes at times is even considered somewhat of a hero in a congregation. Unfortunately, this can result in a situation where things are not done, unless they are done Diotrephes way. We start with examining the Diotrephes personality because it actually has a great similarity to the other bully personalities. They all want their way and in one way or another have found a way to exert pressure to get what they want.

Second consider as a potential bully, Mr. or Mrs. Popularity. If you disagree with them or they do not get their way, then you are going to have a large number of people (their posse) miffed at you. You will be “blackballed”, meaning you won’t be part of their “in” group. Yes, it sounds like high school. Wherever you find folks gathering together: school, work, sports, recreation groups, or congregations, these groups will form. Sometimes, we even encourage the separation, breaking members off into groups and limiting the interaction of the full body together (teens, seniors, singles, couples, couples with kids, mids, etc.). In each of these groups, leaders arise and they are not always the kind of leader that represents Christ appropriately. They take control and exert their bully behavior.

Third consider as a potential bully, the “Youth Minister”. As stated before by me in other discussions, the youth ministers should be mom and dad. However, since this is an ever increasing position within the Churches, let me suggest that the proper person be selected for this position. That is preferably a middle aged man who has raised his children up and out of the home. One who has no illusions about being “King of the Youth”. A person who understands that they are under an eldership and their responsibility is making certain the Bible is taught. They are not a mother or father replacement. What I have seen occur is that a “youth minister” may become one who is viewed as the high authority on how to handle youths. What they want they get. If their way is not approved, they have the youth stage a revolt/temper tantrum to get their way. Parents don’t want whiney children. If the Children whine, the youth minister often gets his way. This means, of course, that an eldership is given the what for by parents for the youth minister and bullied into backing down. Bullying behavior is often accomplished through the means of others (the posse).

Fourth consider as a potential bully, the preacher, who through his words directs a congregation into getting his way. A preacher certainly holds a spot central to a congregation. They also hold the ears of an eldership. This is a position which has no authority, but which yields a great deal of influence. They must remember their position as one who is sharing the word of God. Their words must have the authority of Scripture. They must submit themselves to an eldership all the while being the best servant they can to encourage and aid the eldership. They must not make the decisions for an eldership. The sad part of this close and personal relationship with elders is the wide open area for criticism of undue influence. A strong eldership will not allow such bullying from a preacher or those who falsely accuse him. A strong preacher, will remember he is but a servant with no authority to oversee. Of course, the one caveat here is if the preacher is also an elder. That too is a unique situation, but this is why choosing an eldership should not be done in haphazard fashion.

Fifth consider as a potential bully, wives of preachers, deacons, and elders who must remember they are not co-preacher, deacon or elder. They are simply Christians. Often congregations treat these folks as if they do have authority. They have none. Many a wife has dominated what happens as far as ladies groups, activities, youth education, and class discussion. The influence a wife has upon her husband is great. Yet, it is not their place to badger or coerce their husbands into decisions (I Corinthians 11:3). This is not an uncommon behavior. This bullying reflects poorly upon the family and the congregation. Briefly, on the other side of that coin, many a preacher, deacon, and elder’s wife has been mistreated for the decisions or actions of their husbands.

Finally considered as potential bullies, let’s group together the family who contributes a large amount each week, the family with many children, and the family who has many generations of members attending. These groups are offering very precious commodities. Funds are often viewed as indispensible (they aren’t). Youth are often viewed as indispensible (they aren’t). Many members are often viewed as indispensible (they aren’t). Are all of these a blessing to have? Yes! Can a congregation be sound and pleasing to God without them? Yes. Yet, some folks feel they can get their way if they threaten to leave and take their funds, youth, or families. This is a very common bullying ploy in congregations. It is shameful and disgusting. Yet, it is often effective. Everyone tiptoes around these folks because of fear of upsetting them. Weak preachers avoid topics which might cause ripples among them. Weak elderships dismiss preachers who rile these folks with sound truthful lessons.

As stated, these are not the only examples I have seen or heard of which demonstrate bullying in the Church. I do want to point out, however, that these folks often exhibit passive aggressive behavior. Their words are often demonstrative of a “woe is me” or “poor me” attitude. They say all they want was to be helpful, involved, and appreciated. Then, when they don’t get their way, they stop attending, refuse to cooperate or participate in activities and classes, cut their funds, pull their kids out of classes, or go off and create their own activity with their group or friends as a sort of “I told you so” example. They want their way and if you don’t bend, they will show you. They will pout, whine to others, and generally create headaches for folks until they get what they want – unless, the eldership refuses to put up with it. That, of course, goes straight to the topic of Church discipline which is another topic altogether.

Friends, consider these verses:

1 Corinthians 12:12-14 – For as the body is one, and hath many members, and all the members of the body, being many, are one body; so also is Christ. For in one Spirit were we all baptized into one body, whether Jews or Greeks, whether bond or free; and were all made to drink of one Spirit. For the body is not one member, but many. 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 – Or know ye not that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit which is in you, which ye have from God? and ye are not your own; for ye were bought with a price: glorify God therefore in your body.

Ephesians 4:4-6 There is one body, and one Spirit, even as also ye were called in one hope of your calling; one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father of all, who is over all, and through all, and in all.

The body of Christ is to be a unified body. Division is not acceptable. Bullying which causes division is sinful. There is no member or group of members which is more important than any other. If bullying occurs within a congregation repentance must occur. This can occur only if the individuals or groups are approached and directed into proper behavior (Matthew 18:15-17). If they do not repent, then the Godly division which Christ spoke about must occur. The sinners must be separated from the Saints.

Posted in Travis Main | Tagged , , , | Comments Off on Bullies in the Church